May 15, 2017. Three years ago, Matt died. It still seems impossible. We still miss him every minute of every day. It still hurts.
Ron and I would normally go out to Boulder to be together with our son, Brian, during this time but travel is not possible during the time of Covid-19. Well, possible, but not smart.
I love being in Boulder because, of course, Brian is there with his wonderful girlfriend, Kelsey, and my two grand kitties. It makes me happy just being around them.
Bonus, Brian hugs me like Matt did, a full tight hug where he doesn’t let go right away. For that moment, time stands still and I know I am loved and we share our connection of missing Matt.
Boulder is also the place that Matt last lived so I feel closer to him when I’m in Boulder. I see Matt everywhere, walking along the creek path, in the restaurants we ate at, or around the CU campus where Brian went to school.
We put a memorial bench in Matt’s honor at the Evert Pierson Kid’s Fishing Pond along the Boulder Creek Path. It’s a beautiful location with the creek in front of you and the pond and mountains behind you. It’s a wonderful place to sit, contemplate, talk to Matt, and just be. When we requested that location for the bench, they recommended it face the fishing pond saying it was too secluded facing the creek and would encourage homeless people to use it. We told them Matt would be honored to have homeless people using his bench, so please have it face the creek. The plaque reads, Matt Kurtz, 2/13/85 – 5/15/17,
Your goodness & spirit live on in those you’ve touched.
Brian goes there regularly and sometimes leaves a kindness rock. The hope is that the saying on the rock will touch someone, inspire them, or motivate them to spread more kindness. We hope the person who finds the rock will take it, if it speaks to them, or pass it on if they think it will help someone they know.
While I wish we could be there to walk the creek, sit on the bench, and hug our son, sadly that can’t be, but our hearts will be there with Brian and we’ll do what people are doing now for celebrations and memorial services. We’ll zoom with Brian, light a candle, say some words, and share our Matt memories. It’s not enough but it’s all we have.
Matt’s Bench
A place to go and contemplate
A place to feel compassion
A place to appreciate the surrounding beauty
A place to talk to Matt or a loved one you’re missing
A place to rest and a place to just be
If you’re ever out in Boulder, CO . . . . . . We’d be honored if you visit Matt’s bench.
You can find it off the Boulder Creek path at 8th and Canyon Boulevard. If you think about it, email me a picture with you at the bench or write and tell me about your visit.
Is there someone who inspires you with their kindness? Nominate them for the Matt Kurtz Kindness Award of $250.
Do you have an act-of-kindness project you want to do but need help funding it? Submit your idea for the Matt Kurtz Kindness Grant of $250 and let us help you spread kindness.
Beautiful post Jackie. I’m so proud of all that you have accomplished with this site. A true “labor of love”. It captures the essence of who Matt is…kind, compassionate, generous and so much more…. He would be proud as well…
Beautiful post Jackie! Sending love to all of you today! Matt’s bench is a lovely spot to celebrate Matt’s kind and compassionate spirit! Hugs to you today and every day XOXO
thank you deb, feeling all your love and so appreciative of it!
To Jackie, Ron, and Brian:
Today my heart is heavy for each of you. You have lost a son and a brother and no words can bring him back. He is in the hands of the Almighty. Blessed is Matt. His family holds him tight and refuses to yield. You each are full of love and kindness. Matt lives on through your memories and love. Long live Matt.
thanks chuck, for all your love and support. we’re lucky to have such wonderful friends. sending you love.
Such a lovely post. Thinking of you all today especially. We lost our son last year and feel exactly as you do- it shouldn’t have happened. We too miss Mark as you miss Matt and are putting a kindness award in place – kindness in leadership- in the school at which he used to teach in the UK before he then settled in Dubai. Thank you for the inspiration .
Ian and Stella Duncan, UK
thank you for your kind words and for sharing about your son, Mark. it’s impossible, no parent should ever lose a child. your kindness in leadership award is a beautiful way to honor your son. i want to believe in my heart of hearts that somehow, someway they know and would love the tribute to their lives. wishing you peace and health. sharing in your sadness. jackie
Dearest Jackie, What a touching post. I so wish we could all be together today. Hug Ron tight and I’ll hug Brian for you, as he sends you long distance hugs. I miss Matt even though we never got to meet. Brian and I went to the bench a couple of weeks ago – rode our bikes there in fact. It was a warm sunny day and there were tons of little boys fishing In the fish pond. It was a beautiful moment at a beautiful bench honoring a beautiful man. The wildflowers are just popping and I’m sure tubers will soon start tearing down the creek. Summer is coming round again.
PS I can’t imagine how difficult every day must be. But sometimes your grand kittens will snuggle up to a photo of Matt and it makes me smile. I will try to grab a photo next time 🙂
I love you!
thanks kelsey. I wish you could have met matt too. I know he would have loved you as we do!
Arms of love to you and yours
thank you.
My heart is with you, Ron and Brian today and always. It is hard to believe that it has been 3 years but it never gets any easier. The bench is in a beautiful and serene place especially with the mountains reaching to the skies. I would love to go there someday. Please know that even tho we don’t talk every day, you are in my thoughts. With love, Fred & Beverly
thanks bev.
Can’t wait to visit this bench on my next visit to Colorado
hopefully we’ll all be able to get out and travel sooner rather than later. hope you’re enjoying married life! stay healthy and safe.
Beautiful Jackie
Matt’s bench sits near a tree
A single act of kindness throws out roots in all directions and roots spring up to make a tree
Matt is throwing out kindness 24/7
that is a beautiful saying. thank you for sharing it.